| I want all of you, forever, you and me, every day |
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[07 Aug 2005|01:49am] |
So yeah i know i haven't written in here for a very long time. I need somewhere to vent however. I don't care who reads this and if you get pissed then so be it, I don't care anymore. My friends all drive me crazy, if I could even consider most of them my friends. I had one true friend a very long time ago and I was a complete bitch and lost her. I don't know if things will ever be the same between us again and to be honest, I miss her. I haven't seen my friends in 2 days and not once do I get a messsage saying "hey how are you?" or "hey how's it going" or "hey i miss you." Of course they hang out every fucking day and then that next morning or afternoon they're like omg I miss you...i love you...blah blah blah. I can't exactly help it that I can't hang out every single day because I have an amazing boyfriend who I love to death. He's the only one who's ever there for me. I can't say I have one best friend. I don't have one person I could go to talk to with all my problems. Some of them will say how two-faced someone else is and then be like ohh i love you soo much we need to hang out tomorrow. I'm sorry but if you really don't like someone then don't act like you do. Why waste your time? I just miss the way things used to be. I'm not part of the "crew" and to be honest I don't want to be because it all a bunch of shit...lets go ahead and be like other people in our school and put a name for the group. How stupid. I can't take much more of this.
I don't want your pity and if you would like to be mad about this then go for it. I'm just saying how I feel I don't really care what anyone else thinks. People change I guess...
Oh and Joe..if you ever read this. I love you more then anything in this world. You are the best boyfriend ever and I don't know what i'd do without you. You help me when i'm sad and you're always there for me when I need someone to talk to. I love you.
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[21 May 2005|11:26pm] |
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I miss the way things used to be. I miss my whole group of friends that used to hang out on Friday nights and have fun. Thats okay though, I still have a few very close friends. I guess times and people change, true friends will always stick around :)
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[08 May 2005|09:25am] |
Soo last week I worked with Leslie on Monday and Wednesday :) I love working with her! Wednesday Joe and I got into a huge fight and Thursday he just kinda ended things yet again. Friday I worked and it was so busy! It sucked but thats alright, I needed the money! :) Rachel and Katie came and visited me.
Yesterday I was pulling out of my driveway to go was my moms car for her and there was this older guy walking down the road. I thought it was kinda weird but I pulled out really fast and stopped right at the end and he stopped in the road and stared at me and then started waving frantically. I waved back and then I pulled out and had my window down and he's like "hii!" I'm like hi! have fun on your walk! Right after I he talked to me I realized he was retarded. Okay maybe it wasn't that funny to you but I live in the country and its kinda weird seeing a retarded guy walking down the road :) haha! Anyway I went to see Dine with Disney with Rachel. The food was okay and everyone in it was amazing :) After that we met Katie and Holly up at Taylor's softball game at Weatherstone. Nick took my car and drove it around and he comes back and was like "you do realize I don't have my license right?" I'm like yeahh I wasn't sure though haha. He said he didn't have the lights on and someone flashed him. What a loser haha. After the game we all went to my house. Joe called and I really haven't talked to him much in the past few days but he's like i'm coming over..i'm like okay this is weird, but okay! So he comes over and we're all just sitting in the living room and he's like I really need to talk to you. So we go into the den and he's like "Jen I thought about you and this other girl and I realized that I don't want to go back out right now but I can't lose you either." I was like well do you still like that other girl? He was like no she's really not that important to me. But I told him that we needed to be more nice to eachother. lol So we're pretty much back to what we were. Haha I love him :) He stayed till about 12 and then I went over to his house and my Mom said I could stay till 1:30 but we fell asleep and I didn't wake up till 2:45. haha! oh well!
Todays Mothers Day and I get to work from 12-6. Oh yayyyy! haha Have a nice day everyone :)
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[26 Apr 2005|05:34pm] |
Friday night I worked till 10. Amanda came in at about 8:30 and sat there and talked to me till I was done and then we went to her house and hung out till like 12. So I had this video on my phone and Amanda saw it, it was quite embarassing and i'm not going to tell anyone about it. :X haha! Oh yeah! I got home from school and there was a stray dog at my house, he's a medium sized dog and is very sweet. We named him Reily and we're keeping him. :)
Saturday I got up around 12 and had my hair appointment at 3. After that I got ready for Junior Banquet. I went to Amanda's house around 5:45 and we took tons of pictures. The limo came around 6:15 and we left for the dance. The dance was a blast, i've never had so much fun in my life. After the dance I went over to Joe's house till about 1 and then went to Katie's house for the night. It was just her amanda holly and I and we slept till like 12.
Sunday I got my pictures developed, went to my grandmas, and then Katie and Rachel came over for a few hours.
Monday Joe came over for a little bit and then I was supposed to work from 5-10 but I got off around 8:30 cause it was really slow.
Today was an okay day. My dad died 6 years ago today so its been pretty rough. I dread this day every year. I miss him so much. :(
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[05 Apr 2005|12:19am] |
It's been a while but here goes...
Easter was nice. Mark was over for that whole weekend so he went to my mom's side of the family's easter with us. This week at school was pretty boring and long. I just wanted Spring Break to come so bad.
Friday after school we went to Cuyahoga falls to see Katie's boy and Leslie met a boy named Chris. He's so cute and nice, i'm happy for her :) Cory's mom gave us money to go buy moolate's from Dairy Queen. I love her. We left there around 10ish and went back to my house for a little bit.
Saturday I worked from 2-7 and then went to Katie's. Joe called around 11ish and I hung out with him for an hour. We had a nice time :)
Sunday I had this really weird dream that my dad's still alive but he wants nothing to do with us. The only person he talks to is my mom on the phone but he's somewhere really far away. So I found out the number from someone and I called him and freaked out on him saying that I can't believe he doesn't come around anymore and why doesn't he care about us and on and on. This is the 3rd time i've had a dream similar to this one, it's starting to freak me out. My Mom has dreams like it too except my grandma only knows where he is and won't tell anyone. Anyway, Sunday I went to see my uncle's house that he's completely re-modeling. My mom and I went to the store and then went to Drug Mart and McDonald's for fries! :) Around 6 Katie Rachel and Leslie came over. A little bit later Taylor came over with food from Zeppe's and Holly and Amanda came over too. Amanda put my gaged earring in my ear for me and we called Shane Mumaw and he came over. Holly, Leslie, and Shane went to get polar pops and the rest of us went to Amanda's so she could get some clothes. After that we went back to my house, Shane left, and we went to Leslie's so she could get clothes to spend the night too. Holly had to go home so Leslie, Rachel, Amanda, and Katie spent the night. We woke up today had breakfast sat around till like 12 and they left. I worked out, showered, took my brother somewhere and then had to work at like 5 with Leslie! After work I got something to eat from Wendy's and went to Katie's house. We had to leave around 11 so I took Rachel home and I was worried about Leslie so I stopped over there for a little bit to see if she was okay. Joe called and I talked to him for a little bit and now i'm going to bed! :)
I love spring break! i've been with my friends everday and I love them :)
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[24 Mar 2005|03:10pm] |
Sunday I went to Leslie's house for most of the day. We made peanut butter cookies and hung out :) After that I went over to Katie's house and we went to visit Amanda at work and then went back to her house and talked cause we were both having rough days.
Monday I worked from 5-10 and got Leslie a job working with me! :)
Tuesday I went to the bank with Amanda after school and then we went to get our nails done at Norton Nails. The chinese guys were so funny except I couldn't understand them so it was pretty funny. After that we went to Casa Del Rio for dinner and then I came home and went to put gas in my car and went to Wal Mart and bought some makeup.
Wednesday I worked from 5-10.
Today i'm going to church for Maunday Thursday and then hanging out with my girls :)
I miss Joe a lot. I know the best thing to do it to try to get over him but everything reminds me of him and I just want him back :(
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[20 Mar 2005|12:24am] |
Wednesday I went shopping with Leslie and Rachel and we went to Swenson's. After that we went to the library cause Leslie and I wanted to look for this book we read in 3rd grade that we still remember. haha. After that we went to Rachel's tanning place. While we sat there and waited Leslie called up James but hung up when he answered so I called him back talked to him for a little bit and then we went to my tanning place (and visited Katie too!)
Thursday I went to Taco Bell with Leslie and then went to see Footloose with her. I developed a crush on one of the characters. hahaha ;)
Friday After school Joe and I got in this big argument and he said that breaking up means we're on a break and he feels like i'm stalking him. So I just got to the point where I was like I can't do this anymore, I have to go and we just ended it there. Sure I cried, but I suppose this is for the best and I hate it when people tell me that I need to get over him like a couple people have so don't say it or i'll probably freak out. I miss him, but i'll be okay. I went to Katie's around 5 and Leslie, Mindy, Heather, Katie, and I went to dinner at Olive Garden and went shopping. I love those girls, but I felt so weird. I guess it was because I'm not used to hanging out with Heather. She's nice, i'm just not used to it. Anyway, on the way home there was a sad song playing and i sat there and cried and had to listen to the whole freaking thing. I was pissed off after that and I just wanted to go home. Leslie came over so she could hang out with me for a little bit because I guess everyone else went to Mindy's house? I'm not sure, but then Holly called and was bored so she came over for a little bit. We were at Taco Bell and I called Nick to see what he was doing and he was drunk and was about to drive home so I told him that we'd come get his car and i'd drive it home. Well, Nick has a stick shift car and i've only driven one once so we called Mike but he was still working and then I figured Joe might do me a favor, but he wouldn't so we just drove out there ourselves and I was going to try to drive it. We drove out to Lodi and he met us there so I could drive the rest of the way. Well, I walked over to his car and he refused to get out so I just got in with him (yeah I know not smart) but he was going to his friends house which was about 15 minutes away. We drove all the way over there and Nick was on the phone with Joe for some reason and there was this bottle of Vodka under his seat that he kept telling me to give to him but I refused. He was hilarious though, he kept me entertained for a while. I love that kid, he cheers me up. After that we drove back to my house real fast and everyone left.
Today I worked from 9-2 and then came home went to Leslie's to get my purse, talked for about an hour and left. I lost a hub-cap on my car so I drove around looking for that for a little bit, got some gas, and then went and picked up Rachel and we went to Wendy's. I went home and cleaned and then picked Rachel up again and went to Leslie's to hang out. It was her rachel me donnie scott and mike the whole night. Amanda called me from the Nelly concert and let me listen to a song even though my phone kept cutting out. haha It was a very interesting night but I can't talk about part of it. haha We watched the Notebook and I fell asleep (of course) I can't watch a movie and stay awake. We left around 12 and that was it! :)
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[16 Mar 2005|03:18pm] |
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If you don't like whats in my journal then don't read it...thats all :)
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[15 Mar 2005|11:39pm] |
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Before I forget again, Rachel did my new layout for me and its very cute :) Thanks Rachel!
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[15 Mar 2005|10:32pm] |
I've been so happy lately...well for the most part..haha :)
Saturday night after i worked till 10 I went to Katie's house and Rachel and Holly were already there. We just hung out and watched tv and I left around 12.
Sunday I went shopping with Mindy and Katie. I got some cute jean's at hollister and saw Taylor and Ashley there. I had a good time! Around 5 I went to my aunts house for dinner for my cousin's birthday's. Nick, Brian, and I went to Marie's to get chicken and pizza in my aunts new Jeep Liberty and I wanted to drive but Nick insisted and lets just say he scared the shit out of me and I closed my eyes because I was too scared to look anymore. I love hanging out with my family somtimes, they make me laugh and I don't have to think about other things...haha :) My cousin Mark called me crying and told me that him and his girlfriend broke up so I talked to him for like an hour trying to cheer him up. Poor kid but its cute that he came to me for advice. I guess I do have a lot of experience with break ups :X haha
Monday I tried to go tanning but the wait was too long so I talked to Katie for like an hour and went home and then went to work from 5-10.
Today I said some mean things to Joe that of course I regretted right after I said them so I went to his house to try to work things out. He was really mad at first but we worked things out and we're we're not fighting anymore. I worked for a couple hours and then she let me go home. I drove out to Lodi to watch my cousin's and Joe's soccer game. I had to drive home by myself even though my brother was there cause he wanted to go with Joe..haha. I was racing Joe home but of course I lost and then I pulled in my driveway and he still wasn't there! haha so he pulls in and I guess he accidentally passed my street so I won! haha :)
Tomorrow I think i'm making Rachel go to the mall with me even though she doesn't know it yet..haha! :) Then i'll probably go tanning and maybe work out. Thursday I get to go see Footloose with Leslie and probably dinner somewhere! Friday i'm hanging out with katie leslie heather and mindy and saturday i'm hanging out with Joe! I love this week/weekend, i'm excited! I can't go see Peter Pan anymore..I was originally invited but Joe's dad said he wouldn't be comfortable so for those of you who were talking about it..just wanted to clear it up.
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[12 Mar 2005|01:11pm] |
Last night I had to work from 5-10. Rachel was freaking out cause its just not the same without me on Friday nights I guess, so she took this fairy doll and taped a picture of my face on it and took it with them. They came to visit me at work while I was trying to help a customer and they were showing me this fairy doll and I was trying so hard not to laugh. haha. I talked to them for a little bit and they left. I left work around 8:30 and went home to change, got something to eat from Wendy's, and then went to Katie's house. They were watching Saw when I got there so I watched the rest of it. I was sitting by leslie and Katie's phone started vibrating during a scary part so we all jumped and I grabbed onto Leslie. lol. Holly came over eventually and we just sat around and talked for the rest of the night.
Today I am probably going to do nothing because no one wants to hang out. haha. I have to work at 5 and then i'll probably do something with Katie and whoever else. :)
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[07 Mar 2005|05:42pm] |
I had a fun weekend!
Friday Rachel, Leslie, and Katie came over and we went to Maxx and Erma's for dinner. After dinner we came back and hung out at my house. Holly came over and left like an hour later. We called up this guy that Rachel knows from Cuyahoga Falls and he came to meet us at Wal Mart. We stood around Wal Mart for like 45 minutes and then I guess got security called on us for some reason so we just left. We came back to my house and they all left.
Saturday I worked from 9-2:30. After work I hung out around here till 6 and then I picked up Rachel and we went grocery shopping for my Mom. We went to Katie's around 7:30 and then when Holly got there we went and rented Wicker Park from Drug Mart and went to Taco Bell cause Holly was hungry. We went back to Katie's house and watched our movie and made puppy chow. I fell asleep through most of the movie cause I was having a rough night. I took Rachel home around 12 and went home and fell asleep.
Sunday I didn't do much of anything during the day except wash mine and my mom's cars. Around 5:30 we went to my cousin's birthday party. Nothing exciting happened there. I came home and did nothing the rest of the night.
Today I got up around 7:45 and picked up Rachel around 9 and we met Katie, Mindy, and Amanda at Ann's Pastry for breakfast. We had some time to kill so we went to Amanda's house for a little bit and then went to school. School went by so fast since we only had 25 minute classes. I love this week! Choir concert tonight...oohh yayy! haha
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[01 Mar 2005|07:25pm] |
Friday Katie Rachel Leslie and I went to dinner at Olive Garden. Leslie and Katie went in to put our names in and they said the wait was 45 minutes. They gave them one of those things that buzz's and vibrates when your tables ready so they just decided to take it with them and we went to Old Navy. Well, we were standing in line at Old Navy and the thing starts to go off so we threw all of our stuff down and I drove over there as fast as I could. The traffic was really bad and we were waiting to cross the street so Rachel tells me just to go! haha it was the funniest thing ever. Then we were sitting there waiting for our food to come and rachel got this little rubber frisbee thing from one of those machines in Old Navy and was sitting on it. She got up to go to the bathroom and i picked it up and it was really warm and so her and Katie come back from the bathroom and started laughing about it. Rachel snorted which made us laugh even harder and then Rachel was like "guys stop my stomach hurts!" which made us laugh even harder so Katie and I just got up and left the table becuase we couldn't stop laughing. It was one of those times where you start laughing and can't stop. hahah After that we picked up Holly and came back over to my house and hung out. They went home around 12 and Joe came over from 12-1.
Saturday Joe and I went to my brothers championship came at Highland and then I came home and worked from 5-10. After that I came home and slept from 11-12:30 and then called Joe. He broke up with me but I don't really want to talk about it and I don't want anyone feeling sorry for me because i'm okay. I was up till about 3 talking to my mom..it was so nice, i'm glad I have her to go to when i'm having a tough time.
Sunday was an okay day. I went to my grandma's and watched a movie and then Rachel came over. We went to dinner with Amanda and Amanda at Buehler's and then Rachel and I went to visit Leslie for a little bit. We left there around 7:30 and I went home and watched the Oscar's. Joe called and then I fell asleep close to 11:30.
Monday I went to my Grandma's house for dinner and then came home did my choir tape and went to choir rehearsal from 8-9. I was in the best mood ever that night and I have no idea why.
Today I came home from school, went to pick up my paycheck finally! I haven't been paid for a month. I owed my mom most of it and had about 45 dollars left. I went tanning and then came home and did some homework. Now i'm going out with Joe :)
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[23 Feb 2005|08:15pm] |
So today I get home from work and I had this message from Joe.
Baby mine don’t you cry
Baby mine dry your eye
Rest your head close to my heart
Never to part
Baby of mine
...from dumbo..haha
We got in a fight last night so i was all upset today about some things..i love himm :)
haha okay go ahead and call me gay :P
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[21 Feb 2005|10:39pm] |
Monday was Valentines dayyy! Joe brought me a dozen roses, I gave him what I got him, and then we went to Don Pablos for dinner. We came back to my house and hung out and that was about it!
Tuesday I took Joe to get his car after school. After that we went to get Polar Pops and went back to his house till 5 or so.
WednesdayI worked from 5-10. So i've been working in the pharmacy for about 4 weeks now and still haven't been paid so Greg asked if I needed any money to hold me over, but of course I said no. He's so nice though!
Thursday I went to my brothers game with my Mom and Joe. After the game I did English for the rest of the night.
Friday I went to dinner at Bennigan's with Katie, Leslie and Rachel. After that we went to Amanda's house and HP and Maria came over. We left around 11:30 and I went to Joe's house for a little bit.
Saturday I worked from 9-2 and then Joe picked me up to go to his aunts house around 2:30. We left there around 7ish and he dropped me off. I picked up Rachel and we went to wait for Amanda to get done working and then went to Wendy's. After that we went to Amanda's house and hung out. Holly and Katie came over and then Caitlin came over. We all piled in Caitlins little escort to go pick up Maria and the car was almost touching the ground. It was hilarious. Josh, Zach, and Danielle came over to Amanda's and we just hung out and watched the Notebook and I left around 12.
Sunday I went to work from 12-6 and then Joe came over and we watched The Notebook and Saw. I was very disappointed with The Notebook because the book was 100 times better. Saw was just fucked up.
Monday I got up and worked on psychology for most of the morning. Joe came over and hung out with me for a while and then I went to work from 5-10.
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[13 Feb 2005|03:41pm] |
i'm so dumb!
I decided I wanted to go wash my car so usually I just pull into the turn around and no one's parked in there. Well Nick came over and parked in the turn around. I didn't even look and backed into his car. I've never hit anyone or gotten a ticket or anything so I was freaking out. I got out and his car had blue paint on it from my license plate and my license plate was dented but that was it. My Mom told him what happened and he didn't care, he said he'd just get some rubbing compound and get it off. haha i'm such a loser :)
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